This is the forward I wrote for the book The Philosophy of Dark Paganism: Wisdom & Magick to Cultivate the Self by Frater Tenebris
Back in the late 90s when I was struggling to find my own spiritual balance in Paganism, I had no idea I was about to start something that would take on a life of its own. At the time, I felt very much alone and out of place. There seemed to be a phobia toward anything that hinted of darkness or (gasp) the dreaded Left Hand Path. In hindsight I am sure the “satanic panic” of the 80s and early 90s set the stage for very defensive Pagans battling with that stigma, and led to a bit of over compensation, to say the least! But as a young man just coming into his own spiritually, I felt all the more isolated and confused. Somewhere I seemed to have taken a bit of a detour. Was I still a Pagan? Did it even matter? In my youth I was still so fixated on labels and conditioned from my Christian upbringing to think I had to follow something “official.” But If I had questioned the faith I was raised in, why could I not question the faith I am drawn to?
It was from this confusion that I began to write small essays, purely for myself to better organize and articulate my thoughts. Those essays eventually took the form of chapters, and thus Out of the Shadows came into being. When the book was released, I was expecting the worst. I envisioned angry emails, bad reviews, and generally becoming an outcast in the local Pagan community. But that was not what happened. Suddenly I began to get emails and written letters of thanks. I had put into words something that others lurking in the shadows of Paganism had been feeling. As it turned out, none of us were as alone as we had believed.
As I began to tour and speak at various gatherings (not an easy task for an introvert like myself) I had the opportunity to meet these kindred spirits. What intrigued me was how diverse we could be when it came to details of belief and practice, and yet still able to relate on a deeper level. Dark Paganism is very much more a mindset than a specific path or tradition, and I was always careful not to share the details of my personal practices in fear of influencing how others would express themselves.
That was a long time ago (like “before iPhone” long time ago) and thanks to the internet Paganism has become extremely diverse and Dark Pagans abound in various forms and names. Others have since shared their perspectives on the subject – some I feel aligned to, and some that make me cringe, and both have their place. Each perspective offers the reader an opportunity to explore how it applies to THEM. After all, I did not write Out of the Shadows to tell readers what to do. I threw out a lot of ideas to see how it landed and to encourage others to explore for themselves.
Over the years many have written to me asking for advice on how to get started in Dark Paganism, and I am sure most found my response a bit… unexpected. I had no “dark spells” (whatever that is) to share, or mysterious rites and practices to offer. Instead, I suggested a few books I personally found useful (such as the works of Jung and Ouspensky) and said the best thing they could do is learn critical thinking skills, and embrace a consistent meditation practice. Independent thinking and self-reflection, to me, are the greatest skills for anyone who walks a dark path. I dare say they are essential for any practitioner of magic. Are you walking your path, or buying into someone else’s approach? Are you changing the world to conform to your will, or are you conforming to the will of others? Why do you do what you do, and believe what you believe? It is that journey of self-exploration and expression which is the hallmark of those who walk the darker paths. It is what unites us despite our varied outward appearances and practices. We have all embarked on a journey of self-discovery and self-transformation and have come into our own in the process.
This is why ultimately I have always been more interested in what YOU were doing with these ideas. How do they reflect in your magic and life? I did not care how gothic you looked, or how cool your tools were, or how spooky your rites could get. I wanted to know about your journey and struggles. Some may argue this had made me a good mentor, but in all honesty, it was just as much for selfish reasons. You see, I am painfully aware as humans our perception will always be limited. We are all wearing blinders of some form, and while I have spent decades learning to recognize and see past my blind spots, I will never be fully free of them. So it is from hearing of your journeys that I often find inspiration and fresh insights to keep me out of boxed-in thinking. I may not always agree with it all, but it has never failed to make me think. Besides, who am I to judge your path? While some have dubbed me the father of Dark Paganism, I only refer to myself as that in jest. As I quickly found out, I was never alone – I just helped to get the conversation going.
So here we are, 22 years or so since I first released Out of the Shadows, and it excites me to see what Frater Tenebris is doing here. This is exactly what I like to see – others sharing their own insights, learnings, and practices. My advice to the reader, which may sound heretical for an author, is not to take any of us too seriously. Play with these ideas. Question them. Take nothing at face value. My challenge to you is to not base your findings on assumption. Get your hands dirty. I have found myself humbled many times in my life by stepping out of my armchair and actually doing the work only to find my assumptions and opinions wrong. How glorious it is that the universe is far more interesting and expansive than we give it credit for! The greatest trapping on a dark path is the ego. As great and profound as we can be, we are still human, and always growing. It is when you feel you know it all, or have reached some pinnacle of perfection above others, that you can be sure you took a wrong turn along the way. My parting advice is this: Get over yourself, stay curious, and most importantly, have fun!
John J. Coughlin
New York
February 2022